bitch bitch bitch

i am horrified that any show that would bill itself as "the dream team of american medicine" would brag about noting that a woman was pregnant.

then again, that's probably the raving childfree in me. sure, it's probably a good thing that a woman who *wants* kids is pregnant. but, please note that fact before trumpeting it. otherwise, it makes me twitch a lot.

dr, phil needs to beat it. he makes too many assumptions.

work.

i start my job a week from monday.

this scares me. i've had summer jobs, i've had school-term jobs, i've even had full-time jobs for a short term, during my year off between college and law school. however, i've never had a full-time, indefinite-term job that was actually part of a career trajectory. my job that i'm starting a week from monday, of course, is the first real job of my legal career.

even though i worked there for twelve weeks last summer, and know a lot of the people there, i'm still really scared. i don't know if i'll like it. i don't know exactly what projects i'm going to be on, or exactly which attorneys i'm going to be working most closely with. i don't know if i'll be any good at what i'm doing. i know the summer associate experience is nothing actually like the experience of being a real associate, so i still feel like i'm going into this job blind.

furthermore...i've had a ton of free time over the years being a student, and even more free time over the last month or so. i've had the freedom to drop everything and skip town when i've wanted to. i've had the freedom to sleep until noon at will, and ditch class if i felt like it. i'm not excited about giving so much freedom up. i'm going to be working a lot of hours; that is the lot of the junior associate. i can't let work become my entire life; that's not the kind of person i am. i will make room to maintain a social life and a personal life outside of work. however, i know it is going to be an uphill battle.

it still seems completely surreal that i start work so soon. i keep telling myself that i still have time off...but these last few days, it has been creeping up on me, unavoidable.

from the stupid criminal files...

dear would-be criminals,

if you want to take hostages, you're well advised to keep them under wraps until you can abscond into the ether and evade the police. to do this, you need to actually hold your captives...well, captive.

you don't send them unattended on a beer run. they may come back with cops.

love,
the persecuted crack smoker

Bob's not Smilin' anymore.

best blog post title ever, courtesy of Above the Law:

Smilin' Bob = Epic Fail.

it's a post about the head of Berkeley Nutraceuticals¹, the company that makes Enzyte, being sentenced to 25 years in the slammer for fraud, conspiracy, and money laundering.

***
¹ strangely enough, there is no mention of this momentous occasion in the "in the news" section of Berkeley's website.