faceless_wonder: posing with my blue hair, in an NYC subway station. (Default)
faceless_wonder ([personal profile] faceless_wonder) wrote2009-10-18 04:43 pm

:P

(warning: whiny, cryptic rant ahead.)

i've been feeling really weird, really off, these last few days. i know in my head what i want and need to get done, but nothing's coming. i'm going through a time of banging my head against a wall repeatedly. there's no real reason why i can't get past that wall...i just can't.

maybe i'm scared of change. maybe i'm scared to fail. maybe i've convinced myself so well that anything i could possibly do would be a disappointment that some switch has flipped in my brain to tell myself that it's better not to even try, and therefore let people continue to think i might be able to do something that i'm convinced there's no way i'll actually be able to wrap my head around.

[identity profile] tottenkoph.livejournal.com 2009-10-19 02:36 am (UTC)(link)
I have no doubt in the many, wonderful things that you are capable of accomplishing. You're in a rut, that's all. The best way to get out of a rut? Force yourself to do *something* you didn't think you could do. I hope that this isn't a result of the CCC thing, it's not a personal reflection on you. They're being extremely picky this year (all of Nick Farr's submissions got rejected). If you need someone to talk with, I'm here. :)