Mister Coke

i know this is the last refuge of the persecuted crack smoker, but every so often something so silly comes up that doesn't relate to crack that i still find it worth mentioning. this is one of those times.

if your name is Mr. Coke, don't grow up to be a drug lord.

in general, growing up to be a drug lord is a bad idea. sure, rolling in cash can be a lot of fun, and there are probably plenty of good-looking women who are still stupid enough to think it's cool to show their breasts to the rich drug lord in town. you might even get a bit of a power trip from convincing people that you're a legitimate businessman and a good guy.

however, making it that far in drug-lord-dom is difficult. unless mommy and daddy were drug lords before you and passed on the family business, making it that far requires a lot of wheeling, dealing, and potentially pissing off other drug lords and wanna-be drug lords who would rather kill you than give up their businesses. that's a pretty big risk to take.

even if you're lucky, and you become a drug lord superstar with a big house and five cars, it's eventually going to come crashing down anyway. when you're on top, rival drug lords will still want to kill you and take your business, so you still have a target on your head. living with armed guards 24/7 can't be fun.

drug running is also illegal. eventually people may trace the supply to you, and the local constabulary will eventually start knocking on the door. if you don't answer, they'll probably start getting a little more insistent, and their desire to kill you may rise to rival the other drug lords'. that doesn't sound like a relaxing way to enjoy the fruits of your labour.

and, if your name is Coke, people will clown on you for entering such an ominously fitting profession. if you're that desperate to match your job and your name, maybe going into the steel profession or the caffeinated beverage profession would be slightly less fraught with peril.

you're welcome.

DEMF, HOPE, WORK.

i am all over the place tonight. my brain is bouncing around at a mile a minute, and i'm not quite sure how much sleep i'll actually get tonight.

****

i've pretty much recovered from DEMF this weekend. it was worth being there for, but not in the way i expected. the festival itself was not quite my thing. that's not to say the music wasn't good...the sets i heard were enjoyable, especially Plastikman's to close out the main stage on Friday night. but...the bad things about being in the festival outweighed the good. it was ridiculously expensive to get a ticket into the festival. the plaza was extremely crowded, and i am not a huge fan of being in very crowded areas. the weather was hot, which i don't tolerate very well. and, worst of all, the security guards were royal, powertripping jerks.

what was worth attending, and generally full of awesome? the side parties. the Bang Tech 12 preparty on friday night was a lot of fun. the music was sweet (especially DJ Psycho's set...), and the rooftop porch was breezy, with a good view of Detroit. saturday night after the festival, we went to the Detroit Techno Militia party...and even though the music wasn't really doing it for me the way i'd hoped (i think they had the bass turned WAY too high...), the venue was this random gallery in a run-down section of town, and there was a good feeling there.

monday morning was the highlight of the weekend. Dethlab threw an early-morning (8am-noon) parking lot party, and it was sweet. the music was my favourite out of any of the music i heard all weekend...seriously, i must see them spin again. (hear that, niteshad? keep an eye out for shows! *grin*) it was really low-key...lots of random chatting, sipping tasty Motor City Ghetto Blaster beer, and having a good time. there was also a really fun interlude around 10:30 or 11, when people noticed that someone had left a cooler full of water balloons in the parking lot. i hadn't been in a water balloon fight in forever, but for a while six or eight of us were laughing, carrying on, and attacking each other with water balloons. we left the party around noon because we were tired (8am party = very little sleep beforehand!) and the heat was starting to get to me, but i wish that party could have lasted all day.

***

i found out this afternoon that my talk proposal for The Next HOPE has been accepted! i'll be giving a reworked version of my Notacon talk, about how to make the hacker community more welcoming to new people. i'll be working in content from the post-talk Q and A at Notacon into my talk, and i'm looking forward to having an equally interesting conversation about it with everyone at HOPE.

***

also, i start my new job tomorrow! *eek* i'm excited about it, but also a bit nervous given that it's a new situation, a new group of people, and a new career. i doubt i'll be sharing many specifics about it, given the utterly public nature of this blog and the utter stupidity of talking too much about one's work on such a forum, but needless to say it's a topic that has been spending more and more time at the front of my mind as tomorrow draws closer.