the blank top chronicles

warning: blatant pimping ahead--blatant pimping of something that deserves to be blatantly pimped.

i can't believe i've never found the blank top chronicles before. this blog is absolutely hysterical. it's written by an extremely sarcastic cab dispatcher in arlington, virginia. it consists of conversations that he has with some extremely stupid customers.

do not read this blog in class, or anywhere else where it may be uncouth to fall on the floor, in stitches. because, i promise, you will fall on the floor in stitches when you read this. for example, here's an excerpt from the most recent entry, about a dumbass in texas who called this cab company in virginia:

ME: Blank Top, your phone number please?
GUY: Yes I have been waiting almost half an hour and nobody is coming.
ME: You're at ------- Hall?
GUY: Yes, how much longer?
ME: Hard to say, probably like ten o'clock tomorrow night if the driver doesn't stop to sleep.
GUY: Pardon me? ten o'clock tomorrow night?
ME: Well yeah. I told you three times we're an Arlington Virginia taxi. It takes a while to get from Virginia to Texas. If you wanted it sooner you should have called a company in Arlington Texas.

and, it only gets better from there...that's why the blog deserves to be blatantly pimped. i hereby give brian, the guy who writes the blank top chronicles, the inaugural Persecuted Crack Smoker Award for Hilariously Mocking Stupid People.

interview you?

1. Leave me a comment saying, "Interview me."
2. I respond by asking you five personal questions so I can get to know you better. If I already know you well, expect the questions may be a little more intimate.
3. You WILL update your LJ with the answers to the questions.
4. You will include this explanation and an offer to interview someone else in the post.
5. When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them five questions.

***

these questions are from ikkle:

1. Where were you born?
kettering, ohio

2. Who is your favourite family member?
barkley (the miniature schnauzer) is very cute and fuzzy :D

3. Which school subject made your brain die?
high school history made my brain die...it was all about memorizing dates, and not actually about thinking.

4. If you could watch only one TV show for life, which would it be?
beavis and butt-head. it's been my favourite for years. my sense of humour makes it so obvious that i'm a twelve-year-old boy trapped in a twenty-four-year-old girl's body. that show cracks me up.

5. Which websites do you visit most often?
too many--because i'm so addicted to the 'net it's not even funny. anyway, i'm incessantly on perjuries.com (a mock trial forum that i have almost ten thousand posts on), livejournal.com, the facebook, fark.com ('cause i'm a weird news junkie)...and then, a ton of blogs that i keep up with.