(no subject)

it is way too early in the week to be as zonked out as i am. still, between trial practice all day saturday and all day yesterday, and then staying up until 3:30 last night working on my brief that was due today, i'm only awake by the false rush that caffiene and necessity can provide. i was supposed to go to the tailor and pick up my suit today, but that didn't so much happen...there was an unforeseen delay, so i have to do that tomorrow. that is a problem, since the only time i can do that tomorrow is before my 9am class. that means i have to get up around 6:15, go wait for the bus, and truck myself over to the central west end to get my suit. then it's back to wash u for my conlaw class and my oral argument for legal writing before i leave town. that also means i have to carry all my baggage for kansas city with me...with me to the bus stop, with me to the tailor (and did i mention that was all the way in the CENTRAL WEST BLOODY END?!?!?!?!), and with me back to school.

and, i also have to do laundry tonight and pack. that would be no biggie if i could go home now. but, no, of course i can't go home now. i have trial at 6:30. this being the last practice before hitting the road for the tournament, i have a funny feeling that we'll be lucky to get out of school by midnight. maybe i'll take a short nap now, here in the commons...although, i'm so afraid that if i pass out now, i am not going to be able to wake up for whenever i set my alarm.

everything will be so much better at noon tomorrow. i just want to be on the way to kansas city. i can sleep in the car. i can spend the next few days, with my body on a somewhat normal schedule, focusing on mock trial. i know i should quit my whining, since i am taking an almost weeklong vacation from class for the sole purpose of mock trial...but i get cranky when i'm tired.

my angel died that day...

cold broke up, just this weekend.

i don't know what to say. they're one of my favourite bands ever. this means no new albums. even worse, this means no more live shows. they put on such amazing live shows, and the energy between the band and the fans was so amazing, both times i saw them...

having a band i love so much break up when they're still making such good music...it's such a sad, sinking feeling. a band who makes music that you relate to...you can sit, listen to them, and feel like you're spending time with a good friend who understands you. that's how listening to cold always made me feel. their music has been a constant in my life since i was eighteen...

it will still be a constant in my life. i'm grateful for the eight or nine years that the band was in fact together, and for the music they made, and for the many times they kept me sane when nothing else could, the many times they gave me something to relate to when all i could do was wallow in grief, or work through anger, or simply disappear.


"ocean"

if the wind could bring the rain
i would save it all for you
make an ocean to sail away and begin again
they said i could never change
that i can't belong to you
then i watched you slip away in the ocean's arms

i'll never get you back
it's like falling down a wave
falling down a wave

if a star could light the way
that could take me back to you
and the rain could wash away
everything i've done
only melody remains
so i sing my song to you
as i watched you slip away in the ocean's arms

i will never get you back